We continue with a series of questions and answers about the Amish. Here is the second question I asked Brenda.

Question: For those parents and/or children who leave that community, what are the biggest difficulties that await them as they try to integrate themselves into American culture?

Answer: “In my experience, there is one of three reasons an Amish person leaves:

* to escape the rigid, myriad, oppressive rules

* to explore religious freedom and a faith-based life

* to shed the Amish life and belong to the non-Amish life.

I could go into detail and share stories about each of these three reasons but, that’s another post. To keep it focused, I’ll answer the question of helping.

Since I live with, love, and assist those from out of the uber strict Swartzentruber Order, all my answers apply to these groups.”

While the difficulties are many, Brenda chose five areas of major concern and gave specific advice relating to them.

1) Recognize they grew up speaking Deutsch. They’re ESL or EOSL – and educator’s term for English as a Second Language or English for Speakers of Other Languages.

2) Offer to help the ex-Amish obtain a birth certificate and/or a social security number.

3)  Ask if he/she needs clothing or housing.

4) Patiently encourage them to earn a GED.

5) Live graciously and give unconditional love.

Brenda will explain each way, one-at-a-time, and tell us specifically how to help them integrate. We begin with strategy #1…

1) Recognize they grew up speaking Deutsch. They’re ESL or EOSL – and educator’s term for English as a Second Language or English for Speakers of Other Languages.

They don’t understand, weren’t introduced to, nor comprehend many of our words. When talking to ex-Amish, watch for subtle facial cues that they don’t understand a word, then explain or define it. You don’t need to “dumb down” your language but do bear in mind and respect that they need some comprehension help and typically won’t ask you to explain.

I was sitting at the ICU bedside of a young lad who’d left his PA Amish community. He’d been in a horrific car accident and the surgical staff was explaining to him the surgery plan. I could tell he was bewildered with their words. How can he make an educated decision about his body and medical care when he doesn’t understand what they’re saying? I thought. So I mentioned that he was ESL and asked the surgeons to explain in “layman’s” words. They accommodated and the lad was enabled to understand and ask questions about his surgical care. Love looks out for the needs of others.

I’ve found that common words – mayhem, astronaut, summary – are unfamiliar to many ex-Amish. Remember, Amish complete school at eighth grade. Most have never been taught science, history, or social studies. Respect their dignity yet need to learn. Be empathetic. Alert to their not knowing a word. Define words.

Next Tuesday you will hear from Brenda about how to

2) Offer to help the ex-Amish obtain a birth certificate and/or a social security number.

To learn more about the insular, mysterious Swartzentruber Amish and those who left, visit my Beyond Buggies & Bonnets blog www.BrendaNixonOnAmish.blogspot.com.

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