Today’s Q & A starts with an A.

It comes in the form of a professionally prepared article by Kenney Meyers called

“THE BULLYING EPIDEMIC – WHAT YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN NEED TO KNOW”

(http://www.kenneymyers.com/blog/the-bullying-epidemic-what-you-and-your-children-need-to-know/).

Here are some specially selected excerpts from that article that I thought you might find particularly helpful.

What is bullying?

A bully is not someone who engages in a single incident of teasing or horseplay. According to Dan Olweus, bullying has three characteristics: 1) it is intentional behavior, 2) it is repeated over time, and 3) it is characterized by an imbalance of power in terms of physical strength or social status. Examples of bullying behavior include the following: when another student (or several students) insults, harasses, spreads lies or rumors about another child or threatens or physically assaults a peer.

What can you do to help prevent abuse?

When you talk about bullying with your child, make sure that he understands that no one should be the object of repeated teasing, name-calling or ridicule. Talk to him about how bullies target someone, and explain that a bully tries to isolate his victim. The best thing to do when you are being bullied is to get help. As the parent, you are your child’s best ally, but let him know there are many other allies he can turn to, including teachers, guidance counselors and school administrators. All of these adults are trained to intervene.

Of course, the best way to inoculate your child to bullying is to make sure he has healthy self-esteem. Let him know that he deserves respect. Tell him it is never his fault if he’s being bullied; it is always the fault of the bully. Children need help understanding that ignoring the problem usually makes it worse. If they are unable to stop a bully, get help. Bullies have power because they isolate their victims. If the victim gets help, then the bully loses all power. You have to confront a bully to make the abuse stop.

Be cyber savvy!

One of the most important things you can teach your child is to be Internet savvy. Although some bullying starts with a face-to-face conflict, plenty of bullying today begins with incidents of so-called “over-sharing” on social media. Talk to your children about the risks and dangers of sharing personal statements online

And finally, here are two more excellent tips:

• Set a Google alert to your child’s name. If there is any negative material (or any bullying) that pops up online, you’ll be among the first to know.
• Keep up-to-date on the latest apps and sites. It almost goes without saying, but if you don’t understand the technology, there is very little you can do to protect your child.

Moving forward

One final piece of advice: the best way to teach your child anything is to model the behavior yourself. Demonstrate tolerance to your children, show them that you respect others and let them know you are willing to listen. If you see bullying, step in and set a limit. Let your children know what you did and why. Over time, you’ll learn together how to combat bullying, avoiding tragic fates that plague so many other kids.

NOTE: For more information and to get answers to even more of your questions, please refer to the whole article in the link above.

 

November! The Month of Giving Thanks

Nassim Sana, counselor and certified life coach, tells us that

“as human beings, we have an innate need to feel happy, and one of the major ways to create that sense of happiness is being thankful.”

This is a quote from her article Can Gratitude Change Your Life, published in the November 2013 North Edition of ArizonaHealth & Living.

 

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