Not long ago I tweeted about a yard sale I went to and the lessons that kids can learn from such sales.

Soon after a fellow on twitter un-followed me. His last tweet was, "I'm so glad that business isn't like yard sales. Barter for everything. I'm happy to pay retail for products that DESERVE it."

This comment set me back for a moment. I often pay retail when I buy, especially when I purchase from my own Mommy Perks clients - to support their small business efforts. I have no problem paying retail to help support our economy.

Futhermore, if he thinks that business is nothing like yard sales, his Business courses failed him miserably. Remember bartering? Remember Trading Posts from way back when? The entire concept of trading goods and services has been around since the beginning of time.

I quickly realized that this young man was single...no kids (viewing his tweets). I thought back over my pre-motherhood days and about how judgmental I was back then. I replied to him (feeling a bit pissy): "I pay retail to my clients, often. Our neighbor had a yard sale because his wife and son passed away. He wanted closure. I was happy to help."

His reply was something like: "Well, I'm glad that retail matters in some way."

Wow.

I began to ponder his response and the arrogant nature of his statement. Rather than putting people and relationships first, he was sticking to his original concept that paying retail makes him a better person than me.

Not long after, it hit me: his statement ground my nerves because he reminded me of an old me. I used to be that snotty, know-it-all little brat. That used to be me.

Before kids.

Here are just a few of the things Motherhood has taught me, for which I'm thankful...

I know nothing

Every time I think I have it figured out, the rules change, the temperature changes, the tide turns or another kid comes along. Each kid has his/her own personality and regardless of how much I wish they could all be parented in the same way - they can't. This exhausts me and leaves me with far less time to be a judgmental person. Even if I wanted to judge other parents, in public, I don't have the bloody energy.

I really used to be a giant turd

I used to judge parents, before I had kids, thinking, "Why can't they just keep that kid under control? What is WRONG with that mother/father?" What kind of kid demands rocket-shaped popsicles in the store while threatening to remove any chance of financial support for his elderly parents after he becomes a famous ball player? What kind of parent raises a kid like THAT?

Me. That's who.

Good sitters are harder to find than a non-cheating husband in politics

Can I get a whAt, whAt? Yeah - you parents know what I'm talking about. With this new generation of entitled teens, it's darn near impossible to find a sitter who doesn't text, talk on the phone, surf Facebook for boys or feed gum to the kids for dinner...after which time demanding that she be paid in cash, hopefully a week in advance, and get a raise, too, because the kids didn't bleed from the head.

When I find a good sitter, I know it. And I treat that sitter right. I was a nanny for about 16 years. However, until I had children, I had no real understanding of what the parents went through, locating a hard working and trustworthy childcare provider. Now I know.

Yard sales

I used to think that people who liked yard sales were cheap. After having three kids, a mortgage, a car payment, high gas prices, joining the town charity group to which we donate, giving money at church, buying food for kids in town who need to eat, donating to the local school functions, sending gifts to loved ones, paying for food and paying for business expenses I now fully respect those who yard sale. The items would end up donated or inside land fills, otherwise. The American culture teaches us to buy and buy and buy until our homes can hold no more. Then...we rent storage units to harbor more junk we don't need. I enjoy taking my kids to yard sales where what little pocket money they have can be put to good use. 

I realize now that one of the reasons my parents were able to take good care of four daughters (on a pastor's salary) was because of yard sales. My mother was a fantastic bargain hunter and could spot a great educational book or game from ten feet away. Now - I can do the same. Having three kids gave me the motivation to spend some weekends driving to the homes of strangers asking to look through their crap.

Tolerant of turd-like twitter boys

Oh, yes. Last but not least, having kids and being a mother gave me more patience. Even for turd-like twitter boys who think they have it all figured out. Boys who will likely marry yard sale junkies who force them to shop for used undies in a bargin bin outside the home of a neighbor.

One can only hope, anyway.

ABOUT the Author:

Shara Lawrence-Weiss is the owner of Mommy Perks, Personal Child Stories, Early Childhood News and Resources and Kids Perks. She and her husband co-own Pine Media. Shara has a background in education, early childhood, nanny work, published freelance, marketing and special needs.